Samsung Shows A Sharp Sense Of Humour With Their New “Galaxy Blade Edge”

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This post was published 9 years, 10 months ago. Due to the rapidly evolving world of technology, some material it contains may no longer be applicable.

Yes you read that headline correctly! Samsung have just announced what they are calling the words first “smart knife” named the “Galaxy Smart Blade Edge”.

This is all rather bizarre but what this appears to be is basically a Samsung Galaxy S6 edge with a handle and a sharp diamond knife-edge, which Samsung boasts is “razor-sharp” and “capable of slicing delicate heirloom tomatoes and tough enough to cut through a lobster tail”.

The body is supposedly made of patented , “beautiful ergonomic ceramic” which they say make it “tougher than stainless steel yet lighter than plastic” and allowed them to create the “optimal curve.”

Samsung are also claiming to have optimised the blade’s surface tension, “making sure that your fresh organic shitake mushrooms or wild Perigord black truffles don’t stick to the edge when you’re cutting them.”

The Galaxy Blade edge offers a wide array of features too including great food photography capabilities, a thermometer-equipped stylus, a foldable handle and it even claims to be water proof – a feature we wish they had included in their regular S6 edge!

Galaxy Blade Edge 2

In addition to all this, Samsung promises that the internals are packed with sensors to aid your cooking and food preparation:

Galaxy BLADE edge features a set of sensors and algorithms that analyze your grip, dexterity and strength, setting the weight in optimal proportion to create the perfect rhythm and inertia. This smart feature, in league with the super sharp edge, makes chopping and cutting up to 50% faster than with conventional knives. It also has a special feature for slicing fruit and dicing vegetables.

The Galaxy Blade edge should be safer than ever before too as it features Samsung’s “defense-grade” KNOX Security system, which in this case also detect your skin and retract the blade before it cuts you.

It’s not just small cuts it will protect you from either, Samsung are claiming this knife will help out in situations of violence thanks to its human blood sensor which will trigger a call to the emergency services as soon as it makes contact with human blood.

Sadly it doesn’t look like there will be any preventive measures to stop crazy people from killing your pets in a mad rage, although maybe with a later OTA update they can patch in the detection of the blood from dogs, cats and other common domestic animals which would not typically be used in food.

You need not worry about accidental calls from this system though because Samsung has thought of that too:

If a call is made by accident, all you have to do is scan your fingerprint, swipe the security pattern, punch in the 15-digit password and sing along to the random-selected song from your most recent Milk Music station and the call will be cancelled.

Another great feature of KNOX security is the anti-virus system which not only checks the system for digital computer viruses, but also helps against the traditional kind that we living organisms are susceptible to.

Not just viruses, but bacteria too! KNOX will “alert you to any germs found in your ingredients or on the surface of your cooking top” which sounds very handy indeed for those of you who are not too fond of getting food poisoning from salmonella or e.coli.

The stylus with integrated thermometer will also be handy for ensuring your meat is cooked through or “to let you know when your pan-seared foie gras is the right temperature, and when your baked Camembert is ready to be taken out of the oven. ”

Samsung also suggest you could “use it to ensure the correct water temperature when cooking braised beef short ribs sous vide.”

Galaxy Blade Edge Physical Spec

Inside, Samsung has swapped out the UFS memory from the regular S6 and S6 edge for U4CF (Ultra 4D Curved Flash) memory, which they claim will better the previous 3D vertical stacking techniques they first introduced in 2013. This is an impressive claim but they back it up by saying it features “10nm-wide wormholes that send data to a far-away cloud.”

Unfortunately, we fear this is going to come with Samsung’s infamous TouchWiz, but like the S6 it should be less intrusive than it was on devices from previous years. It will however include a couple of new apps “Samsung Kitchen” and “Chef Collection”. The former sounds pretty useful given the use-case for this device, but the latter is likely just bloatware and you’ll want to replace that with something better from the Play Store.

In terms of accessories, Samsung say you will be able to get custom handles which options including high-quality olivewood or a “premium mammoth tusk ivory inlay edition, made from real mammoth tusk**, found beneath the surface of the North Sea.”

Or, if you are feeling more old school, you can go for the stainless steel or stick with the default ergonomic ceramic.

Also soon to be available are protective sleeves, covers and charging blocks. The protective sleeves sound particularly necessary when you consider how sharp that diamond edge will be!

There has been no word yet on whether the wireless charging blocks will use the Qi standard but it is likely it will support multiple wireless charging standards like the S6 and S6 edge. Samsung did say though that you will be able to store you (now useless) “dumb-knifes” in the charging blocks alongside your new Galaxy Blade edge – which should be nice for decorative purposes if nothing else!

** Samsung states that no mammoths were killed for the handle – upon discovery under the North Sea, the tusks were carefully removed from the fossilized bodies, which were given a respectful burial back to their age-old graves.

Okay, so this is of course an April fools joke and certainly not a real product!

It is all very good fun, but unless you happen to be in one of the few timezones where it is already (just!) Wednesday, such as the New Zealand Chatham islands or maybe Pevek in Eastern Russia (in which case you should probably be asleep at this time anyway!), then it is not actually April 1st yet and so it does seem Samsung may have been a tad premature here.

Perhaps they just wanted to jump the gun on their competitors, although Samsung’s blog which posted this is called “Samsung Tomorrow” so maybe they just like doing things a day early!

Anyhow, we expect to see many more tech-related April Fools jokes come flooding in over the next 24 hours or so. Google tends to really run wild with these, usually allowing each team to create their own crazy new feature (and sometimes actually implementing it to a degree) so we look forward especially to seeing what they come up with!

Source: Samsung

label_outlineapril fools, blade edge, Galaxy, humour, Samsung, satire
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